Round 2 GND!

Ok, here I am again at the SCCA and Jim my infusion nurse just hung my first bag of Gemzar. This is the first of the three "healing potions" I'll be receiving today. As I told Jim, the first cycle of GND was my "jab" at the cancer as it shrunk some of the tumors. I'm looking at this cycle as the "uppercut" which will continue to shrink those tumors and start to shrink the others. I need this as I can feel something in my back press against my lungs when I inhale. It's on the right side and I'm hoping it's scar tissue or inflammation from the last treatment. We'll see how things go as I know part of getting chemo is getting used to mysterious aches and pains throughout the body. I think I now have an idea of what it's like to experience old age (no offense to anyone up in years out there)! I also changed my first tune on my media player to welcome the chemo. I was reading a book and a woman who was receiving radiation pictured the radiation as sunlight entering her body. Why can't I do the same about chemo?!

Kinda ironic that I've actually started to feel better today than I have in about a week. I had a nasty case of mucositis this last week which made it tough for me to eat, drink, talk, etc... Thankfully the sores are healing and I'm able to eat and talk again! My energy is back too after being exhausted the last few days due to low platelet counts. Such is cancer as now that I feel better, I have to get more chemo that may bring these side effects back over the next few weeks. Crazy how this works but it's the price you have to pay to get better and I accept that.

On a good note, I've had buddies here for the last week. Dropped off Mike on Sunday heading back down to Long Beach CA. It was his first time in Seattle and I think he enjoyed it. We had nice weather which helped. Getting ready to drop off Dan tomorrow morning early (5:10 flight, yikes!). These guys are like brothers to me and it was great having them here helping me feel "normal" for a while.

I'm continuing my investigation of the mind body connection as it pertains to healing. I'm reading a fascinating book (Love, Medicine and Miracles) by Bernie Siegel M.D. The book was given to me by Jackie's neighbor who somehow knew that I was sick without ever talking to me..., weird. I wish all doctors practiced medicine like this guy. He treats your mental health along with your physical health while stressing nutrition and has achieved some very good results. I'm becoming more and more convinced of the connection between mental health and physical health as I read along.

What does this mean for me? Well, I've already started positive visualization techniques through meditation. I've also started to express these visualizations in the form of drawing and painting! I went out and bought my first beginners paint set with 5 colors, a couple of brushes and a canvas. I have to say that I have zero artistic talent and that's an understatement. I did my first painting of a Hodgkins tumor cell surrounded by my killer T cells and had the Hodgkins cell spewing blood and not able to take on all of the T cells! So my artwork is a work in progress but I find it soothing and cathartic and plan to continue. Who knows, maybe I'll get a little better and have the nerve to show someone my work one day! By the way, all of this may sound weird to some of you and I understand that. Please know that I'm not losing my mind but just trying to use everything I have in my arsenal to beat this stinkin cancer...

By the way, I have to thank my buddy Dan for getting me into painting as he's been doing it now for over a year and getting pretty good. He's actually getting ready to enter some of his work into an art fair down in Delray Beach FL. Hope he does well...

Finally, looking forward to Jackie coming home from New York! She's been over there active in her new roll as a Buyer for Amazon.com! So, if you need any towels or kitchen items, take a look at Amazon for some of Jackies' stuff. How's that for a plug babe?!

Till next time...